Rainbow Child

How else can I feel after waking up at 7 every morning, getting back home late in the afternoon, sometimes at night, and having almost no time for myself? On the other hand, it’s great. My colleagues are all so nice and I love the chit-chat we have when we’re taking a break. Actually, getting up is easier than I had expected, but all the tiredness just knocks me over the moment I enter the apartment. I have successfully mastered the art of eating, getting dressed and drinking tea at the same time. And the art of getting from the very south of Berceni to Piața Presei Libere in exactly 1h.

I am officially a bus runner (someone who runs after buses) now. If I miss one bus, my whole elaborate plan of arriving at work in time is fucked. And I am also starting to have anger management problems. The first bus and the metro are OK. The second bus is a bitch. So many people, so little space. But a 25-minute walk through the park, in this weather, doesn’t sound like fun. The point is that people are stupid and they don’t understand the concept of ‘crowded’ and they yell when you accidentally bump into them. I know that one day I’ll lose it and hit the bastard who complains about that. I really don’t like people.

I think I just need to adjust to this new schedule and I’ll be fine. And I have to find a way to accept the fact that the good old lazy days are over.

…is a good cup of tea. But I can’t cause I’m not allowed to. I have to take some iron supplements and because of that I can’t have real tea, just herbal infusions. I’m OK with herbal infusions, but I’ve been drinking so many cups of that wannabe tea that I’m sooo sick and tired of it. On the other hand, I want to see some improvements at the end of the month and I know it’s for my best. As you can see, I’m being reasonable. It must be because I’m getting older.

Yesterday was such a long day. I had an exam, but that was just fine. I love that professor! She is so nice and open-minded and she reads only contemporary literature – yep, just my type. Some people are simply right for what they are doing, while others… Don’t even get my started! I am so furious when I see that the same rules don’t apply to all of us, that some people get a special treatment… It just makes me sick. ‘Some animals are more equal than others’ totally applies to my MA program.

All the bars were full yesterday. It was very difficult to find a table for four on Lipscani. Most of  the bars have high prices, are full of smoke and have shitty music. And still, they are full. Going out is getting more and more frustrating. I’m considering buying lots of bottles of white beer and enjoying them at home. Maybe we’ll even buy a board game (the puzzle wasn’t such a good idea). Or maybe we’ll reserve a table in Absintherie Sixtina every time we want to go out and then we won’t be forced to drink overpriced beer in some horrible bar.

It’s difficult to choose what to read next. I’m so moody and so… I can’t focus on anything. One moment I’m in bed, then I’m washing the dishes, then I’m reading again, then I’m checking my mails… I’m so jumpy. I need some pills to calm down

I guess that I’m anxious about the future and that’s why I can’t enjoy the present (so cheesy, I know). At least I don’t have nightmares anymore. Also, I’m able to get up before 9 o’clock in the morning, which is quite something for me. What do I do with all that time? I guess I worry it away. I need to change something. Maybe the length of my hair. Maybe my hair colour. Maybe I need to discover new bands or new authors. I don’t know what I need, but hopefully I’ll find out soon enough.

I am so fed up with eating, with having to make small-talk, with having to entertain people when all I want to do is go to bed. I thought that this year Christmas would be better, but it wasn’t. I’m pretty sure I won’t need to inherit the Christmas decorations from Mum. I’m simply not a  sociable person.

I had no idea what I was getting myself into when I said I wanted new tiles. No one told me about the mess, the dust, the long process. I wasn’t prepared for all of that. Thank God that my parents were here to help us. Sometimes I really am a helpless kid. The workers were nice, not your typical Romanian lazy-asses, but they smoked inside and I had to gather all my courage and tell them that it I was bothered by that and that they should smoke on the balcony. No other incidents occurred after that. My father did some repairing around the house (no, Eddie can’t do them by himself ) and then he went straight to Brăila, to visit grandpa. So it was me and Mum who stayed with the workers, did some shopping and spent some good ol’ quality time together (he was at work most of the time).

Please don’t tell me that the colours don’t really match. I already know that and I don’t care

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We’re finally renovating the apartment! Not all of it, not at once, but little by little. We’re starting with the tiles. Goodbye ugly-whatever-thing-on-the-floor, welcome colourful tiles! I had to go to the other side of the city to find them but I hope they are worth it. So, after months of postponing, we’re finally having it done. My parents are arriving tomorrow – yes, the whole family has to come to my rescue – and we’re starting the renovation on Thursday. I know that if I survive this, I can survive anything!

Until I have the new tiles, I’ll post some more pictures from Dublin.

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